Moving On

Today I really feel like shit, because after a fallout with her mother, my 28-year-old daughter moved out of the apartment. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’ve always knew that both of my kids will eventually move out on their own and go on their own journey, but the thing is, that I’d never thought that she was going to leave on bad terms with her mother. To make things crazier, they were both born on the same month and the same day, plus they have similar attitudes and behave similar. I know that things will work out, but for me, as a husband and as a father, it really hurts to see them like this. They do get along, it’s just that from time to time, they clash.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!


The Failure

It’s funny how sometimes I look back at my life and I feel that I have failed as a son, as a husband, as a father, as a brother and as a friend. I mean, I look back at a lot of decisions that I have made in my life… and I ask myself… Why? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that I have been a dick or an asshole. It’s just that sometimes I think that I could have been a better person. I have always given others the benefit of the doubt and I have tried to be the best person that someone could meet in their lives. But sometimes… just sometimes… inside of me… it feels as if that hasn’t been enough. I feel that people have expected more from me… and I feel that actually… I should have given them more.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

From Rag To Riches

It’s funny, but for some weird reason, lately I have been reading books about successful people who started with nothing. People who were close to losing everything that they owned, broke and or even homeless. Don’t get me wrong, like I told my shrink a while back, I’m not planning on starting a business anytime soon. It’s just that for some weird reason, I find it fascinating, to learn how some of today’s multi-billion dollar corporations got started in the first place. I just like to learn, the history behind big brand names. How they went from absolutely nothing, to something big.

The one thing that I have noticed about old school entrepreneurs is, that they never set out to become millionaires or even billionaires. They started their companies, just because they wanted to work for themselves, not for someone else. They just wanted to have a successful business and make a living out of it. In other words, a business that would help them pay their bills and live a comfortable life. Which is something that I don’t see in today’s young entrepreneurs. Today, people want to start a business for fame and money, which I think are the wrong reasons to get into any type of business. But what do I know.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

Life Is Not A Cliché… Enjoy

Like I have mentioned before, I didn’t know how long I was going to stay sober. So I had a couple of beers last night, so what! You have to understand, that I like to be me, not what others want me to be. I stayed sober… or better yet, I didn’t drink for three weekends in a row. Just keep in mind, that I don’t see myself as being an alcoholic, I just drink way too much, when I get started, that’s all. What did I do when I drank last night? The usual… I listened to some old school House, Freestyle and Hip Hop music. You see, I’m not the type of drinker, who likes going to bars or parties and get into trouble. I just love staying home, playing or mixing some good old school music and enjoy myself.

My whole point is, that you have to be yourself… as long as you are not an asshole or a dick, then you are good to go. Go out, enjoy yourself, do the things that makes you happy. My only advice is… don’t fuck up on purpose! Don’t be an asshole! Don’t be a dick! Just enjoy yourself and have fun with the people who are around you. Hey look, we get to live just once and we have to enjoy it. If you’ve been reading my crazy and insane posts, you’ll know by now, that I feel like shit from time to time. But to be honest with you, I eventually look at the light at the end of the tunnel. I know that, that might be a cliché, but I have to say, that is the honest truth. Sometimes life sucks, but we can’t just give up when the shit hits the fan. If Phil Knight, Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos and others, would have given up when they were against the wall, where would they be right now? Just think about that one for a second.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all! 

Sometimes Life Sucks And Then Some

I remember that when I was around twelve years old, there was a lot of tension going on in my family. My father was a very strict man and my older sisters had grown up and wanted to do as they pleased. The thing is, that one day, my father decided that enough was enough for him, and so he picked up his belongings and while nobody was home, he just walked away and left the family. I’m not going to say that life was easy, but we did survive. I’m not even going to say, that I went on to become a college graduate and I’m living a fairy-tale life. The thing is, that I dropped out of high school when I was around sixteen years old. But I used to blame my father for all the shit that I went through in life, but then I came to realize that I was to blame for my own fuck ups.

What I am trying to say is, that right now, there are times in my life, when I just want to walk away from everything. I just want to leave everything behind me and start a new life in a quiet small town. A place like the Cheers sitcom intro song says… “a place where every knows your name… and they are always glad you came”. A small town, with a population of only a couple of hundred people. Somewhere that I could just grow old and die alone. Do you want to know what the funny part of it all is? That… it’s just a thought. I just feel like that, when things are going downhill for me. But like everything else in life… I will get over it and eventually move on.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

I’m A Loner. So What?

Not so many people know that out of nine children that My parents had, I am the youngest one and the only boy. I remember that when I was between three and five years old, my family lived in Puerto Rico. I still remember the place, because we had a big mountain for our backyard. I remember that I used to go up the mountain all of the time and play by myself, for who knows how long, because I enjoyed it so much. As I go older, I really got to enjoy playing by myself. As a matter of fact, to me, it was something normal.

My point? I just don’t know where people got the idea that being a loner is a bad thing. I mean, being a loner doesn’t mean that I hate people and that I hate spending time with other human beings. You have to understand, that I have been a loner my whole life, but I still do socialize with others. You see, I don’t expect others to like everything that I like, so there are certain things that I like to do alone. I also like to be alone in order to be able to think and reflect on life and also to recharge. A lot of people need to do some really good research before they call someone a sociopath rather than a loner. Also, only because I am a loner, doesn’t exactly mean that I am depressed and thinking about death, it’s just that I enjoy spending time by myself. Plus I have been married for thirty years, have two adult kids and a crazy dog, in other words, even though I am a loner, I love spending time with my family.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

The Bad News Is… The Bad News

A few days ago I decided to cut down on my news consumption. The reason for this is, that I feel that the news, either print, TV or even the internet, is all about bad news. Another thing that I have noticed about bad, depressing and sensationalized news stories is, that it affect my mood and how I feel about humanity, life and the whole world in general. Just like anti-social websites, right now I feel that reporters and news companies, just care about ratings and making money, not about bringing the truth to the people who use or consume it.

I remember when I was a young teenager, the reporters back then, actually did research and brought stories that really matter to their readers. Today, they don’t do the research like they are supposed to, they get wrong information from sources that are not reliable and they just don’t care if the story matters to their readers. Plain and simply put, it’s just about rating and money. It is really sad, because back in the days, reporters were people who everyone looked up to and respected. Today the media is about having a story that will go viral. It really bothers me, that when I read or see a story on TV, I must ask myself… is this the truth and nothing but the truth? Or is it some made up bullshit story, by some stupid reporter or network, that is crying out for attention like a baby? The one thing for sure is, that the only news that I have been keeping up with are positive or good news and technology news. Nothing more, nothing less. The rest, is just bullshit.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!