The Not So Perfect Life

Do you want to know who I find very stupid yet funny? The so-called lifestyle bloggers. I mean, these people blog about life, but when you look close… they are just a whole bunch of bullshitters. The thing is, that my whole life, I have always been honest with people and I have always liked people who have been honest with me, and that is the reason why I say, that lifestyle bloggers are full of bullshit, because they don’t have on ounce of honesty in their entire body.

The one thing that I like to let my loyal 1.5 readers is, that I don’t do this for fame and or money, I just do it to be able to say out-loud, the crazy shits that are going through my crazy mind and some of the things that I am currently dealing with in my life. So called lifestyle bloggers just love to portray their lives as being perfect… and I have to tell you, that there is no such thing as a prefect life. You can be as poor as poor can be, you can be as rich as rich can be or you can be right smack in the middle of everything, but I bet you one thing… your life is far from being perfect. That’s the reason why sometimes, you don’t see me post shit for days… because sometimes, life gets the best of me and I just feel like shit, and I just don’t feel like blogging. Maybe, just maybe, you have noticed, that lately, I have been trying to get into the habit of blogging, even when I feel like shit, just to get it out of my system or get out of the funk. The reality of it all is, that my life sucks… sometimes, then I move on. But I don’t try to hide that from my loyal 1.5 readers, because that’s just not me.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!


Life Is Just Life

It’s funny how many lifestyle bloggers are out there in the blogosphere, specially people that just want to become famous and make a ton of money. With me, that’s not the case. My shrink even told me a couple of times in the past, that I can be sort of an expert when it comes to blogging about bipolar II disorder, OCD and social anxiety disorder, since I have suffered from them for so many years. But you see, the thing about me is, that I find it more interesting, to blog about the shit that I go through in life everyday, rather than to be a niche blogger. I really can’t imagine myself, blogging everyday about the same old shit. I mean, in how many ways, can I explain to my loyal 1.5 reader, what suffering from bipolar II disorder, Pure-O OCD and social anxiety disorder is like? I mean, do people really want to read the same shit every fucking day? I BET NOT!

I know that some people might think, that if I blog about my disorders, I might be able to help others that are going through what I have gone through. But you have to understand, that I have been suffering from them for as long as I can remember, so to me, it’s just something normal. It’s just like someone that is born without a limb. To that person, it’s not a big deal, life is just life. But for someone looking in from the outside, that is a totally different story. I guess that what I am trying to say is, that even though I suffer from multiple mental disorders, to me life is life and it feels great. OK! Most of the time.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

Your Demotivational Blogger At Your Service


Even I have to laugh at the title of this crazy and insane blog post of mine. To be honest with you, I don’t even know if there is such a thing as a demotivational blogger… who knows, I might be the first one in the whole wide world. Well, the truth of the matter is, that I call myself a demotivational blogger because, I like to say what I feel and I explain things the way that I see them, not as others want me to. In other words, I hate to sugarcoat shit. WHY? Because it doesn’t matter if you put sprinkles and a cherry on top of a pile of shit… it will still be shit! The thing is, that people have grown up hearing things in a nice way, when in reality… life sucks! and then some!

In this day and age, people really have to wake up and smell the coffee… most of the time life sucks and we just have to get the fuck up and move on. The thing is that I hate to baby grown ass people. Not everyone is going to be someone famous, important, rich or all of the above. The way that I look at it is, that if we keep telling big ass babies, that “the sky is the limit”, they won’t get off of their asses to get a real job. Why? Because of all of the nice bullshit that we tell them. Hey look! If you want to be an artist, singer, music producer or a rich and famous person without any talent… you have to do it on your own time! Meanwhile…. GET A REAL FUCKING JOB!

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

To My Loyal 1.5 Readers

Readers - 1

OK! OK! OK! OK! OK! I know that maybe, just maybe, the one question that .5 out of my loyal, crazy and insane 1.5 readers have been asking for a long time is… What the fuck do you mean by 1.5 readers Tony? Either is 1 or 2 damn it! Well, this is it! The cat is finally out of the bag! Any time that I say 1.5 readers, a picture like this one, pops up in my crazy and insane head. Why? The reality of it all is, that I really think that there aren’t many people out there, other than my loyal 1.5 readers, who actually read my crazy, boring and insane blog posts. I think that people might and I really don’t know how to emphasize this, but just might, skim through my posts and move on to better and more interesting blogs.

My whole point is, that unlike most of society nowadays, I don’t look for attention or approval from others. The whole thing about me is, that I do things because I enjoy them and I like them, not to because someone told me to do it or to get fame and or money. My advice to my loyal 1.5 readers is… do things for you, not for others or just because others are doing it. Do take advice, but don’t follow the so-called leaders! Why? Because that is so fucking stupid! Just look at it this way. Do I care that no one actually reads my posts? No way Mexican Jose! As long as I get the shits out of my head and on to something, I’m OK with that. Unless you are being a dick or an asshole… just be yourself and don’t change for absolutely nobody!

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

The Sensationalized News

For the past few years, I have tried to stay away as much as I can from reading, watching or just being in contact with the sensationalized news… yes! yes! yes! yes! yes! you read that right, the sensationalized news. You see, I understand that news outlets “have” to make money, but the thing that bothers me the most is how they show the news stories to us. I just can’t understand why is it, that they have to make things look or sound bigger than what they actually are. It just irritates my ass, when I read such tittle as “man saves entire family from burning rooftop inferno“, when in reality, it was just a small fucking fire, that even a baby could have just walked away from. I now they just want to grab our attention, but the one thing that I hate the most is, overrated bullshit stories.

Another thing that I hate about the media is, long as stories that over explain and keep repeating things or talk about irrelevant shit that is not related to the story. Maybe, just maybe, my loyal 1.5 readers might have noticed, that my posts are around 250 and 300 words long. The reason for that is, that if I can’t say it in that amount of words, I’d rather not say it. Some reporters just love to write long ass stories, thinking that we the readers just don’t have shit to do with our time. They really have to understand, that people like myself, just want to read a story and get on with our lives. To be honest with you, all that I care about is who, what, where, and when, that is it. The rest, is just a whole bunch of shit.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!


Shits I Don’t Blog About

Even though I say “It’s a blog about nothing”, and I blog about anything and everything that has to do with me, there are three topics that I don’t blog about, and they are as follows, #1) Politics, #2) Religion and #3) Sports. First things first, and I have to be honest with my loyal 1.5 readers. I hate the fucking stupid and ignorant so-called lifestyle bloggers. Why? Because I hate people who do something for the money and not because they love it. Another reason is, that they blog about shit that they don’t know the first thing about, like mental health and other topics that they should just shut the fuck off about. WOW! I really had to get all of that shit out of my system!

Now getting back to the three topics that I don’t touch on my here crazy and insane blog. I don’t blog about politics, because everyone has a different point of view when it comes to who is a better political candidate and why. I also have to add that I hate politicians, because they are fucking liars and assholes, who would do and say anything, just to get elected. On the other hand, I don’t blog about religion because plain and simply put, I don’t believe in any of them and all of their bullshit stories. I believe in what I believe, the way that I want to believe. And last, I don’t blog about sports, because I am not into them, plus I believe that athletes are overpaid assholes, with gigantic egos, thin skins and who are also suffering from small penises complex. They play the many sports, not because they love it, but because they want to become rich celebrities, who think the world owes them something. In more clear words… they can all go fuck themselves!

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

The Drinking Game

OK, I can’t tell a lie, I did drink this past weekend. So why do I drink? Because I don’t have shit to do on the weekends. You see, I do run errands with my wife early Saturday mornings, but after that, I don’t have shit to do, than to watch TV or mix or listen to some House music. I know! I know! I know! I know! I know! Why don’t I look for something better to do on my free time? I have to say, it is not easy, specially in the Winter time. You have to understand, that I hate the cold weather and the snow, so there is no chance in hell, that I will go outside to do shit.

My shrink has suggested numerous times, that I do volunteer work on my free time, but the thing about is that most organization want me to commit a set amount of time, which I can’t do. I mean, I’m only off from work on Saturdays and Sundays and I feel that if I volunteer one or both days, I’m not going to get the rest that I need and I won’t have any alone time. Yes! Yes! Yes! I really like and enjoy some alone time to reboot and recharge my body and my mind. So next time, I’ll just have to stop the stinking thinking as soon as it starts.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

I’m Just Myself

I remember that when I was a kid, I wanted to be just like a superhero. I remember that for Halloween, my parents always got me a superhero costume. As I grew older and I learned about history, I just wanted to be like some people in history, you know, people who change things for the good of humanity. The whole thing is, that looking back in my life, I always wanted to be like someone else, never did I just thought about being myself. I mean, I wanted to make history, I wanted to help humanity and I also wanted to change the world if I could. Never did it occurred to me, just to be myself.

The point that I am trying to make here is, that I see so many people going out in the world, trying to change everything or trying to be like someone else. I feel that they try so hard, that they get lost or better yet, they lose themselves in all the bullshit. The one thing that I learned in my early 20’s was, that I shouldn’t give a flying fuck, about what others thought about me. That included how I looked, dressed, talked, sounded, viewed everything, how much money I had, what I could or not afford and how I lived my life in general. The way that I look at life now is, that as long as I am not hurting myself or anyone else, I shouldn’t give a fuck about what people think or say about me. What I am trying to say here is, that I love being me! I just don’t give a rat’s ass about people’s fucked up opinions and you shouldn’t either. Just be yourself. Feel comfortable in your skin.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

It’s A Blog About Nothing

It’s funny, but I try to post to this here insane blog almost everyday. But the number one question that keeps popping into my mind is. Why do some people even bother reading all the crazy shit that I write about? I mean, does it even makes sense to them? First of all, I don’t have a niche or topic, so I post about anything and everything that comes to my mind on a given day. And second of all, I don’t even know what I am doing. I know, I know, I know, I know, I know… It doesn’t make sense at all to all of my loyal 10 readers. But to be honest with you, it really doesn’t even make sense to me at all either. You have to understand, that I also blog in order to get my crazy thoughts out of my head and on to something.

I know that out of my loyal 10 readers, maybe 1 or 2 might ask. Why the fuck is this a blog about nothing, when you blog about your thoughts? Like I mentioned before, my blog is not a niche blog or a blog about a specific topic. That is the reason why I call it that. To me, it is a place to breathe out, exhale and in other words, get shit out of my mind. It’s a way for me not to go insane. I know that I am crazy because of my multiple mental disorders, but one thing that I can assure you is, that I am not insane… or at least not yet… I feel that I am not there yet, but I am pretty sure that I am getting there. One thing that I would like to say from the bottom of my heart is, thank you for reading my crazy blog about nothing. Better yet, thanks to those who take the time from their busy and crazy lives, to comment on my crazy posts.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!