My Friend James

My friend James in 2018.

First things first my homies and homettes! Wherever you are in this crazy planet of ours, good morning, good afternoon, good evening or good night. Enjoy it to the fullest and don’t let nobody fuck it up for you no matter what goes down.

Based on what my older sister told me, James moved into our block with his wife and kids back in the 80’s, soon after, he became a drug addict. I really don’t remember, because back then, I was a teenager who used to be hanging out with his friends all the time, so I didn’t put much attention as to who moved in or out of our block. I do remember getting to know him back in the 90’s. But even though he is a long-time homeless drug addict, I’ve always seen and treated him as a human being.

I remember that back then, we used to have long conversations. He used to tell me how he had his CDL (Commercial Driver’s License) and how he used to have good paying jobs driving big rigs. A couple of times, he even told me, how he was going to get clean, get his license back and move in with family in upstate New York. Another couple of times, he told me how he was trying to get clean and how he hadn’t used drugs for a couple of days. I always told him, that I was happy for him. But sadly, he went back.

You see, for the last couple of years, I’ve seen how age and long-time drug addiction, have taken a toll on James health. He used to be an energetic fast-talker, full of ideas. Now, he barely speaks and walks very slowly. Just like any other day, he asked me for a dollar and as I gave it to him, I asked him if I could take the above picture, because we have been friends for so long, yet I didn’t have a single picture of him. I also told him, that I have a blog and I wanted to do a post about him. He happily agreed.

You see, I know that this might sound crazy to some people, but for a while now, I’ve been thinking about sitting down with my friend James, so he can tell me his story. But I really don’t know what has been stopping me from doing it. I guess that since I’m not a reporter, I don’t know how to go about it. But the more I think about it, the more I want to do it. Who knows, I might wait for the temperature to get warmer and ask him to sit down with me, so I can hear his story.

Peace out my homies and homettes!

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

Colonoscopy Day


OK my homies and homettes, the day of my colonoscopy is finally here. WOO-HOO! In a few hours, I will be at the mercy of The Assman. I have to say, that the first stage hasn’t been easy at all, since I haven’t been able to eat any solid food since 2:00 pm Monday, when I drank an over the counter laxative after I got home from the salt mines. Then yesterday, I had to drink 1 gallon of lemon flavored Gavilyte-N, in layman’s terms, it’s a another laxative, but that works by drawing large amounts of water into the colon.

Trust me my peeps, I’m not doing this because I think it’s going to be fun or to have something to blog about. As a matter of fact, I was planning on getting my first colonoscopy when I turn 50, which is on October of 2020. I’m doing it because around a month and a half ago, I experience rectal bleeding about 3 or four times, during the span of a couple of weeks. I saw my GP and after performing a digital rectal exam, he found some blood, so he referred me to The Assman. When The Assman concluded the digital rectal exam, he told me that everything looked good, and that he wasn’t that concerned about the bleeding, since it was intermittent. He decided to do the colonoscopy, only because he wanted to find the source of the bleeding. Hopefully it will be nothing but a false alarm due to some constipation, but it is always better to be safe than sorry.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!