Common Interests

Photo by Andrew Coelho on Unsplash

OK my homies and homettes, last night my wife and my baby left to our country The Dominican Republic for a three week stay. I will be leaving on Friday night to join them, but I will be staying only for about ten days. To be honest, I’m happy that I’m taking this trip, but the truth is, that I wished I went someplace else, like The Grand Canyon National Park, Niagara Falls or Mount Rushmore National Memorial. The thing is, that my wife is not into visiting historical, natural or scientific places like me, so I’m just going along with her on this trip.

One thing that I promise myself was, that when I get back to New York City, I’m going to concentrate more on doing the things that I enjoy and like, even if it means doing them alone. I know that my wife and I have different common interests and I’m not going to force her or drag her into doing things that she hates, just to please me. As the old saying goes, “absence makes the heart go stronger!”.”

With that said, I’m Audi 5000 y’all!

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Feeling Like Shit

Image by Gordon Johnson from Pixabay

OK my homies and homettes, to be honest, today is one of those days when I feel like shit. Like I’ve always said, everything stinks, nothing smells good to me. I’m sure not going to kick myself in the head, over something that I can’t control. Sometimes, dealing with my mental disorders feels like a fucking roller coaster ride, but I have come to understand, that those were the cards that I was dealt with.

With that said, I’m Audi 5000 y’all!

It’s OK To Be A Loner

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OK my homies and homettes, for a while now, I’ve been into many arguments with my wife, because I want her to do things with me like visiting museums, camping and going out to enjoy history and nature. But numerous times, she made it clear, that she’s doesn’t like doing those things. Is not that she doesn’t love me, it’s just that we as a couple and as humans, enjoy different things.

When I spoke with the person who approved my medical leave at the salt mines yesterday, he made a good point about getting out and doing things on my own. He told me, that the same thing happens with him and his wife, so from time to time, he goes out and does things that only he enjoys on his own, which he said is a good thing. He also mentioned, that I shouldn’t take the whole thing with my wife personal, which I realized was the case with me. The funny thing is, that for a long time, my shrink Dr. C, has been telling me the same thing. The thing is, that now I understand, that the problem was, that all along I have been taking it personal. So now I’m going to change my mentality and the way that I view things.

One way or another, he also did realize, that my whole life I have been a loner, but one more thing that he mentioned was, that there’s nothing wrong with being who I am, that it is OK to be a loner. Actually, he said that by being a loner, I get to enjoy things that I like on my own, without having to be rushed by someone who accompanies me and is not interested in the things that I am. To be honest, for someone who just met me for about an hour, he did made some excellent points about my mental health, but specially about my social anxiety. Next time that I see him, I will thank him for that.

With that said, I’m Audi 5000 y’all!

The Medical Leave

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OK my homies and homettes, today I had an appointment with one of the doctor’s at the salt mines and due to so many mental shit that I have been dealing with lately, I was given a medical leave until my next appointment on July 15th.

I explained to him, that even though I take my crazy meds every day and I see my shrink Dr. C on a monthly basis, I still have to deal with my Bipolar II, Depression, OCD and Social Anxiety 24/7. Talk therapy and crazy meds do help, but they can only do so much, the rest is up to me.

With that said, I’m Audi 5000 y’all!

Calling Dr. C

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OK my homies and homettes, since my general manager denied my leave without pay from work, she referred me to my human resource representative. My representative explained to me, that I will need my shrink to fill out a form and then I have to submit it to the medical department for approval. She mentioned, that what my general manager wants, is for me to get paid while I’m sorting things out.

The last time that I saw my shrink Dr. C, I did mention to him, that I really needed some time off from work, away from people and New York City, in order to get my thoughts and all the crazy shit that are going on in my head together. So yesterday, he left me a voicemail, telling me to call him today. I just hope that he helps me out.

With that said, I’m Audi 5000 y’all!

The Waiting Game

OK my homies and homettes, I’m 10 days away from leaving to The Dominican Republic, just one problem. I requested a leave with no pay from my employer, in order to stay longer and get my shit and my mind together, but I was denied. Right now, I’m working on other ways to get the time off from work. Fingers crossed.

With that said, I’m Audi 5000 y’all!

It Is What It Is

OK my homies and homettes, since my wife and kids don’t enjoy the same things that I enjoy… like nature, I decided that from now on, I’m not going to let that get in the way of me enjoying them by myself. So yesterday morning, I took a drive down to a park in Manhattan, that is next to The Hudson river, by The George Washington bridge and relaxed there a for a while.

I also did some shopping by myself and I was surprised to see other men doing the same by themselves. So I guess that what I’m trying to say is, that I’m going to start getting out on my own more often, on the weekends. Instead of bitching and moaning about feeling alone. I’m just going to find a way to enjoy my alone time, which so many people don’t get to do very often.

With that said, I’m Audi 5000 y’all!