Why 1.5 Loyal Readers?

TTV - Tallest And Smallest -

First things first my homies and homettes! Wherever you are in this crazy planet of ours, good morning, good afternoon, good evening or good night. Enjoy it to the fullest and don’t let nobody fuck it up for you no matter what goes down.

Where the fuck did you get the 1.5 from Tony? Well my loyal readers, if you were able to get a peek into how my crazy, insane, strange, boring and weird brain works, then you would be able to see, that I am not an “average” or “normal” person or if you want to even go as far as calling me a “blogger”, I’ll take that and run with it. So, a lot of crazy shit and nonsense keep popping into my brain all the time. What do I do with them? I have to write them down quick, before my mind moves on to the next great disturbing thought.

So, for some unexplainable and unknown reason, the way that I look at it is, that out of all the people who visit this crazy, insane, strange, boring and weird blog of mine, the only two people who ACTUALLY read my posts from beginning to end, is one really tall motherfucker and one really short motherfucker. So if you do the math, it would look something like this. 1 A really tall motherfucker + .5 A really short motherfucker = 1.5 loyal readers. There I said it!… The cat is finally out of the litter box!

Peace out my homies and homettes!

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!

Colonoscopy Day

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OK my homies and homettes, the day of my colonoscopy is finally here. WOO-HOO! In a few hours, I will be at the mercy of The Assman. I have to say, that the first stage hasn’t been easy at all, since I haven’t been able to eat any solid food since 2:00 pm Monday, when I drank an over the counter laxative after I got home from the salt mines. Then yesterday, I had to drink 1 gallon of lemon flavored Gavilyte-N, in layman’s terms, it’s a another laxative, but that works by drawing large amounts of water into the colon.

Trust me my peeps, I’m not doing this because I think it’s going to be fun or to have something to blog about. As a matter of fact, I was planning on getting my first colonoscopy when I turn 50, which is on October of 2020. I’m doing it because around a month and a half ago, I experience rectal bleeding about 3 or four times, during the span of a couple of weeks. I saw my GP and after performing a digital rectal exam, he found some blood, so he referred me to The Assman. When The Assman concluded the digital rectal exam, he told me that everything looked good, and that he wasn’t that concerned about the bleeding, since it was intermittent. He decided to do the colonoscopy, only because he wanted to find the source of the bleeding. Hopefully it will be nothing but a false alarm due to some constipation, but it is always better to be safe than sorry.

With that said! I am Audi 5000 y’all!